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Today, I was on the computer in the library on campus. I was facebook stalking this really cute girl that I often see on campus. As I'm looking at her profile pictures, I turn around and the girl is standing right behind me. She gave me a disgusted look and walked off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4040) - you totally deserved it (20632)
On 01/14/2010 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was alone with a work acquaintance at lunch. A noise came from his pocket; he whipped out his iPod Touch and said "Sorry, I have to take this," before walking away with the iPod to his ear. Not only did he not want to talk to me, he thought I was stupid enough to confuse an iPod with a phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30791) - you totally deserved it (9263)
On 08/11/2009 at 8:17am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I found out that not only has my father been cheating on my mother with another woman, but they have a child together with the same name as me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61227) - you totally deserved it (1346)
On 08/09/2009 at 5:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I awoke to my husband donning a gorilla mask in the middle of the night. My kids have been staying in a tent out back for the past few nights, and have complained of a "monster" scaring them. I told them that it was their imagination. My husband says he gets a kick out of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32180) - you totally deserved it (3958)
On 07/17/2009 at 6:02pm - kids - by Divorcemenow (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went to my friend's house for the first time. As I was pulling up, I called him and asked him if I could use his bathroom. He told me to just go in the back and use it, so i did. As i'm sitting on the toilet, someone knocks on the door and asks me who I am. It wasn't my friend's house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35404) - you totally deserved it (6570)
On 07/10/2009 at 5:22pm - misc - by whitewater_al (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my cousin told me that the stop signs outlined with a white line were optional. Later, a cop pulled me over, when I asked why he said, "You ran that stop sign back there." I explained what my cousin had told me and he looked at me funny and replied, "All stop signs have a white outline." FML
I agree, your life sucks (5190) - you totally deserved it (57803)
On 07/08/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, at lifeguard class, I played a victim while my peers strapped me to the backboard in the water. When I was strapped down, I got wood in a wet swimsuit. My hands were strapped down so I could do nothing to hide it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46123) - you totally deserved it (6109)
On 06/27/2009 at 9:47am - intimacy - by Victim (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18983) - you totally deserved it (33618)
On 06/14/2009 at 8:46am - misc - by locksmack (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my boyfriend of almost a year told me he thinks he might be gay. I took off my shirt, sexily climbed over him and began to kiss him passionately. "What do you think now?" I said seductively. His response? "Now I'm sure I'm gay." FML
I agree, your life sucks (54931) - you totally deserved it (10643)
On 06/11/2009 at 9:18pm - love - by Lexxi (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled : "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (220445) - you totally deserved it (244230)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)
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