Today, I found out that my boyfriend joined a group on Facebook called 'Swallow. Or it's going in your eye.' Today I also found out that my boyfriend takes Facebook groups very seriously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3451) - you totally deserved it (972)
On 02/19/2010 at 9:27am - intimacy - by kit_kat14 (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I have the flu, food poisoning and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28178) - you totally deserved it (1528)
On 02/09/2010 at 7:22am - health - by SickSmick (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I found out I have a daughter. How did I find out? She added me on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23536) - you totally deserved it (6390)
On 01/26/2010 at 4:26pm - kids - by Nick (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I got home to find my entire video game collection and all my consoles had been stolen. Two weeks ago I brought them back from my University accommodation, specifically to stop them from being stolen while I was at home for the Christmas holiday. FML
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On 01/02/2010 at 7:35pm - misc - by greatstartto2010 (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I was listening to music, talking to a boy I like on MSN. He asked if I could share the song I was listening to, so I did. It wasn't until I had shared and fully transferred it did I realise it was actually the fake radio show I record on my own, in a phoney Australian accent. All 6 minutes of it. FML
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On 10/14/2009 at 4:19pm - love - by LasagnaRawks (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, a customer at work became violent and started hitting me and my coworker. Not wanting him to get the shit beat out of us, I used a move that pinned the guy on the ground. The police came and he was arrested. I was then fired for assaulting a customer. FML
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On 10/12/2009 at 12:16am - work - by selfdefense - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I returned to the USA after being in Italy for a month. My boyfriend of 6 years picked me up; we had plans to go ring shopping this week. I ran to him, and told him how much I loved and had missed him. He handed me a chocolate chip cookie from Starbucks and dumped me. FML
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On 10/08/2009 at 7:35am - love - by sbgooding - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I met my new roommate. I also met her stuffed animals, who introduced themselves to me. My roommate makes inanimate objects talk. FML
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On 10/06/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by roomie487 - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I got a ticket for having my brights on. The street was pitch black and it was 1:30 in the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21906) - you totally deserved it (3750)
On 10/06/2009 at 11:44am - misc - by ticket - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I went to a club with my friends. I noticed the bouncer looked at me strangely. Then he erupts and screams, "you're the bitch who caused havoc and £255 damage to the cloakroom, pay up or I'll call the fuzz!" Little did I know my 15-year-old sister stole my ID last weekend. FML
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On 09/25/2009 at 4:24pm - misc - by busted (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, my sister broke up with her boyfriend of 4 years because he hadn't "popped" the question. I've just spent the last 2 months helping him plan the perfect proposal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30739) - you totally deserved it (1816)
On 09/17/2009 at 1:44pm - love - by Sadtimes - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I was at the park with my new boyfriend. We were sitting between some trees, when some of his mates turned up at the park. He pushed me behind a tree so his mates wouldn't see and went to join them in a game of football. He pretended not to know me. FML
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On 08/29/2009 at 3:56pm - love - by legallyblondemad (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, after being supportive for nearly a year, my brother finally came out of the closet and introduced the family to his new boyfriend. His new boyfriend happens to be my ex-boyfriend. Guess I know why that didn't work out now. FML
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On 08/06/2009 at 4:01pm - misc - by tryingnottocare (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
